Review: Ross Noble

[kaliha]

As you may be aware, I went to see the lovely Ross Noble last week at the Hippodrome in Birmingham (massive posters of John Barrowman everywhere - brilliant)

There was so much stuff in the first half alone that I had to make notes on my phone in the interval so that I wouldn’t forget everything (sadly I didn’t do this for the second half, which is now a bit patchy on my remembering, having slept since then. :/



My notes on the first half:
Ampules. Pound shops. Glow sticks, Brum a shit hole. Glass. Roller blading. Firing Elton John from a canon. George Michael a womble. Pavorotti. Ringwraiths doing PR for Aston Uni. Learn Direct. Jackie Chan Style. Robin toothpicks. Asthma. Erectile Dysfunction. Eddie Van Halen. Filming Usher fights. Chinese Ambassador. Chin and Wing. Prawn Toast. Ross’ dress sense

His Lordship said that I should leave my review like that, because it was about a random as it actually happened on stage. But I feel some of the things that amused me.

The stage set was awesome (as always) and again bouncy. At the start of the show the face animated with the don’t record or video this and stick it on Youtube message. It had the maddest eyebrows ever :)

[x] Ross himself was sporting a lovely ensemble (in trademark black) which matched with his set as he had a massive cuff on left sleeve which had the black and white pinwheel design from off the backdrop. He says that at one gig a heckler called out “does that come in mens?” hinting that it was a ladies blouson (how dare he!) to which Ross replied “not inas many men as you have!” (boom boom)

[x] At a Chinese Ambassadors reception it would be plate of Ferero Roche – it would be prawn toast instead.

[x] He likes the fact architects are trying to make Birmingham less of a shithole by covering it in glass (to which someone with a thick Brummie accent shouted out “it’s now a shithole covered in glass”). Apparently Selfridges reminds him of Smarties and makes him hungry. He asked if it’s wrong to lick it. (Yes Ross, it is)

[x] A bunch of students on the front row were wearing glow necklaces and stuff which they’d got from a 99p shop. Ross was shocked – that’s even cheaper than a pound shop (of which Brum has many). One of the students has big rock hair and wore his necklace as a halo – Ross christened him the Ghost of Eddie Van Halen and said that he should form a rock group with an Asthma suffer a few seats along and start a cover band called In-Halen.

[x] Ross reckons that George Michael is a bit like a Womble: “Making good use of the things that he finds, shagging the things the everyday folks leave behind.”

[x] Everything sounds much better when you add the phrase “Jackie Chan Style” to it. e.g I’m making love to my lass JACKIE CHAN STYLE!! He wasn’t too sure what JACKIE CHAN STYLE loving would look like though but gave it a good go.

During the interval ritual offerings were left at the shrine of the Noble by people sitting down in the stalls. They included an Owl hat (that fitted him perfectly. He did look ace in it), a one-legged doll he called Heather, a muffin (with the face of Paul Giamatti from Sideways in it apparently) some questionnaires and a birthday request.



During the interval ritual offerings were left at the shrine of the Noble by people sitting down in the stalls. They included an Owl hat (that fitted him perfectly. He did look ace in it), a one-legged doll he called Heather, a muffin (with the face of Paul Giamatti from Sideways in it apparently) some questionnaires and a birthday request.

The second half mainly consisted of:
Ninja giraffes. Admin. Hunchbacked Hovis adverts. Hunchbacks in a taxi. Being strip searched at customs. Bike leathers making him look like an X-man. Racists. Making horses do unusual bowel movements. George Foreman has no fingerprints - FACT. Miniature horses. Cats in horse costumes. Jokes from other shows. Muffins with faces. Muffins of the moment. Starbucks = evil.

[x] Ross was saying that he was at a Starbucks in Glasgow recently looking at the muffins to see if he could see any famous faces. The bloke behind the counter came over to ask if he needed any help, saw it was Ross, gave a knowing look and left him to it.

[x] How many Customs Officers does it take to change a lightbulb?
I don’t know
I don’t know either because they’ve always got their hands up someones arse.
DON’T use this joke when a Customs Officer tells you to tell them a joke. It doesn’t go down well.

And he did his Q&A session afterwards too. He’s not seen the monkey Cadbury advert.

He did give you good value for money. It was nearly eleven by the time he finished so we got over 2½ hours of him. Not bad for just under £20.

I’ll give him a rather funny 8/10 (I don’t think His Lordship was that impressed with him though.)

Then we fought our way through the crowds and out onto Hurst Street. We re-convened in Mr. Egg where I had a frankly delicious Egg Burger (hey, don’t knock it until you try it. I think they’re yumlicious.)

Comments

[alawston.livejournal.com]

The survival of Mr Egg this far into the 21st Century is a source of continued bewilderment to me. Still, I suppose it was too late for a club sandwich in the Green Room.

Hurst Street, how I loved thee...

[--kali--.livejournal.com]

I love Mr Egg. And unlike some rather expensive restaurants in them parts I've never had food poisoning so they're OK with me. :D

[lanaya1980.livejournal.com]

Am highly jealous. Although I did see the top of Ross Noble's head the once when he was doing a signing at Virgin Megastore, Birmingham.

I'm assuming John Barrowman is appearing on stage later in the year then? What in?

[--kali--.livejournal.com]

Aladdin. I may have booked my tickets months ago. I couldn't possibly confirm or deny that though. ;)